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TOPIC: More of a mental health question.

More of a mental health question. 1 month 2 days ago #3737442

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Traveler wrote:

JUJO wrote:

Traveler wrote: I am age 75, and I have lost all of my family and all of my friends. I am the last of my group. And, I live completely alone. The last time any one knocked on my door was several weeks.
Obviously, at my age, I could die any day now. I'm not terribly concerned with death itself, but I am rather bothered by the prospect of dying alone. It is a certainty that no one will even know until the landlord comes to collect the rent, which could be weeks.

I have given this a great deal of thought. And, I'll be darned if I can come up with some way of thinking that gives me some peace about being so alone as the end nears.







Depending on what county you live in,have you ever thought about getting personal alarms for the elderly?
Also a key safe,this is securely fitted to the wall outside your home, with your keys inside,if you take ill and are able to phone emergency services,they have the information to gain access to key safe,to gain access into your home,
Writing a will is vitally important,
If you own your own property,and have no family and friends, it is entirely your own choice if she want to leave it to charity,
You can actually arrange your own funeral,to the way you want it,
I know someone who did this,they have since died,but they were not married,not in a relationship,no children, they wanted to make sure everything was covered,they arranged their own funeral,
When the time came, absolutely everything was sorted,


Two problems that I didn't mention in my original post. 1.) I live in Northern Mexico so there are not the same or even similar organizations for the elderly. 2) I am also nearly completely deaf, so my ability to communicate with others is extremely hard.


You sound as though you do have the greatest asset anyone could have at our age, to give you some chance of countering your obvious difficulties, and that is "all your marble", (so a good brain)!

If folks here can help in any way I'm sure they'll try, and I'd suggest you keep reaching out to whatever bona fide organisations there are around where support can be found, (and as much as possible, "keep your spirits up"!).
The following user(s) said Well Said: Pats, Aida, JUJO

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More of a mental health question. 1 month 1 day ago #3737495

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JUJO wrote:

Traveler wrote:

JUJO wrote:

Traveler wrote: I am age 75, and I have lost all of my family and all of my friends. I am the last of my group. And, I live completely alone. The last time any one knocked on my door was several weeks.
Obviously, at my age, I could die any day now. I'm not terribly concerned with death itself, but I am rather bothered by the prospect of dying alone. It is a certainty that no one will even know until the landlord comes to collect the rent, which could be weeks.

I have given this a great deal of thought. And, I'll be darned if I can come up with some way of thinking that gives me some peace about being so alone as the end nears.







Depending on what county you live in,have you ever thought about getting personal alarms for the elderly?
Also a key safe,this is securely fitted to the wall outside your home, with your keys inside,if you take ill and are able to phone emergency services,they have the information to gain access to key safe,to gain access into your home,
Writing a will is vitally important,
If you own your own property,and have no family and friends, it is entirely your own choice if she want to leave it to charity,
You can actually arrange your own funeral,to the way you want it,
I know someone who did this,they have since died,but they were not married,not in a relationship,no children, they wanted to make sure everything was covered,they arranged their own funeral,
When the time came, absolutely everything was sorted,


Two problems that I didn't mention in my original post. 1.) I live in Northern Mexico so there are not the same or even similar organizations for the elderly. 2) I am also nearly completely deaf, so my ability to communicate with others is extremely hard.






Do you not use hearing aid to help you with your hearing?
Have you ever thought about going online and looking for resources,help etc organisations that help elderly people in Northern Mexico
This could really help you


****************************************************************************************************************************
I do have several sets of hearing aids but they don't offer much, if any help. My hearing doctor has told me that my hearing is about as bad as it gets. Oh yes, I can hear certain noises, but I don't understand what people are saying. If a man talks in a very deep voice, I can sometimes make out a word or two , but when a woman speaks (they have a much higher pitch voice) i can't hear even any noise.
Prior to Covid 19, before people started wearing masks, I could occasionally read their lips. Now, I can't even do that.
I don't recall the last time I had a conversation with someone but it has been quite a few years.
I feel as if I am in solitary confinement in prison. Total silence 99% of the time.
Thank God for subtitles. If not for that i'd not be able to watch TV or a movie.

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More of a mental health question. 1 month 1 day ago #3737521

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Can your ENT(Ear Nose Throat) consultant do another hearing test and hopefully be able to offer you a hearing aid that could help you
Don’t give up,

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More of a mental health question. 1 month 1 day ago #3737788

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Many of us meet up in the Buzz Chat Rooms and we chat pretty much round the clock as we all live in different countries. This is a great resource for those who spend a lot of time alone. We type the conversations so hearing issues don't come into it.

Sometimes folk try the chat rooms just for a few minutes and give up on it, saying we all seem to know each other, or that there were not enough people in there. I would urge you to try them at different times of the day and stay long enough to give it a chance. I would suggest at least half an hour.

I can promise you everyone will say hello to you and be eager to talk to you. We all enjoy new people coming in. We are a friendly bunch. Within a very short time you will feel a part of things. I look forward to chatting with everyone each evening and at times we have a lot of chatters from all over the world in at once.

Looking forward to seeing you there.
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More of a mental health question. 1 month 1 day ago #3737793

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grahamg wrote:

bluegrassmusicfan wrote:

Traveler wrote: am age 75,
I and I have lost all of my family and all of my friends. I am the last of my group. And, I live completely alone. The last time any one knocked on my door was several weeks.
Obviously, at my age, I could die any day now. I'm not terribly concerned with death itself, but I am rather bothered by the prospect of dying alone. It is a certainty that no one will even know until the landlord comes to collect the rent, which could be weeks.

I have given this a great deal of thought. And, I'll be darned if I can come up with some way of thinking that gives me some peace about being so alone as the end nears.


Same for me, and I am so tired of people offering suggestions that they think i am too dim to have already thought of..
Everything they suggest is a poor substitute, and, oddly..none of the "suggestors" would *ever make a tangilble effort to be a better friend, etc....


It shouldn't be this way obviously, but I doubt I'll have anything much more awaiting me when my time comes, so fractured are families it would appear, and so little forgiveness for whatever character traits we've maybe exhibited someone didn't like perhaps!

On a positive note there is buzz isn't there. smile.png


I would agree with what you say and after all you can't take it with you and when your gone it's guaranteed family fight over it if its even done legally. Ahh the good ole human race..
As far as BUZZ is concerned will admin at the helm we can't go wrong..or just delete us..lol

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More of a mental health question. 1 month 1 day ago #3737798

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JakBird wrote: Question...just out of curiosity have any of you written a will on your departure from this life, just to let others know what your plans and finances were to go to...

After I lost my wife earlier this year I was faced with that question. I had not expected to outlive her, so everything was set up to support her. No kids, but she did leave me with a request to see to her three nieces, who take care of my wife's mother (she's 95, they all live in same town).

So I arranged for entire estate to be split between them when I go. Not a huge fortune, but it'll be enough for each of them to pay off their mortgages, assuming I last for the average lifespan. They have all the legal papers and instructions from me on what to do, so I sleep at night not worrying my useless brother might get it all.

I live alone, rarely have any visitors, but there's a weekly call from mother-in-law or niece to make sure I'm still moving around. I'm the solitary sort anyway, works well for me.


Its sad when they say blood is thicker than water meaning brothers and sisters and yet there like the vultures of the family ready to pick your bones without care or respect for you.
And yet neices etc can have a more human caring nature inside as yours do and all know what to do.
Before my dad died I got him to do his will why he was in the right frame of mind and thankfully he did as he died around 6 months later of stomach cancer. It was done all legal in front of a lawyer or solicitor and I was next of kin and power of attorney and so on..my sister had been borrowing money from my dad over last couple of months due to moving home against her payout on the will, which left her £500. And she knew what she had coming and excepted it, so when finances were all paid and I asked her to come over to mine to discuss money..I said it was all now dealt with and she was having her £500 of which she got, then out my own money I gave her a further £4500 to help her out even though we didn't get on.
I'm now getting threatened by her with mobile messages saying she wants mire as it wasn't enough..and there's no more money left as one thing my dad forgot to tell me was a couple of large finances that wernt paid..But I've no ìll feeling and did what was asked.

There's family and then theirs family.

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More of a mental health question. 1 month 1 day ago #3737801

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JUJO wrote:

Traveler wrote: I am age 75, and I have lost all of my family and all of my friends. I am the last of my group. And, I live completely alone. The last time any one knocked on my door was several weeks.
Obviously, at my age, I could die any day now. I'm not terribly concerned with death itself, but I am rather bothered by the prospect of dying alone. It is a certainty that no one will even know until the landlord comes to collect the rent, which could be weeks.

I have given this a great deal of thought. And, I'll be darned if I can come up with some way of thinking that gives me some peace about being so alone as the end nears.







Depending on what county you live in,have you ever thought about getting personal alarms for the elderly?
Also a key safe,this is securely fitted to the wall outside your home, with your keys inside,if you take ill and are able to phone emergency services,they have the information to gain access to key safe,to gain access into your home,
Writing a will is vitally important,
If you own your own property,and have no family and friends, it is entirely your own choice if she want to leave it to charity,
You can actually arrange your own funeral,to the way you want it,
I know someone who did this,they have since died,but they were not married,not in a relationship,no children, they wanted to make sure everything was covered,they arranged their own funeral,
When the time came, absolutely everything was sorted,


JUJO top marks and that's best way to do it, but depends on where you live and what country, but would imagine every country has something similar in place to cope with such situations. I guess go looking on websites in what country your in.

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More of a mental health question. 1 month 1 day ago #3737807

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Traveler wrote:

JUJO wrote:

Traveler wrote: I am age 75, and I have lost all of my family and all of my friends. I am the last of my group. And, I live completely alone. The last time any one knocked on my door was several weeks.
Obviously, at my age, I could die any day now. I'm not terribly concerned with death itself, but I am rather bothered by the prospect of dying alone. It is a certainty that no one will even know until the landlord comes to collect the rent, which could be weeks.

I have given this a great deal of thought. And, I'll be darned if I can come up with some way of thinking that gives me some peace about being so alone as the end nears.







Depending on what county you live in,have you ever thought about getting personal alarms for the elderly?
Also a key safe,this is securely fitted to the wall outside your home, with your keys inside,if you take ill and are able to phone emergency services,they have the information to gain access to key safe,to gain access into your home,
Writing a will is vitally important,
If you own your own property,and have no family and friends, it is entirely your own choice if she want to leave it to charity,
You can actually arrange your own funeral,to the way you want it,
I know someone who did this,they have since died,but they were not married,not in a relationship,no children, they wanted to make sure everything was covered,they arranged their own funeral,
When the time came, absolutely everything was sorted,


Two problems that I didn't mention in my original post. 1.) I live in Northern Mexico so there are not the same or even similar organizations for the elderly. 2) I am also nearly completely deaf, so my ability to communicate with others is extremely hard.


But you can still communicate via online and that's a good thing in your favour. I had an aunt in similar circumstances and no children or family living and she was the last, she gave home..cars and everything to her young neighbour on the understanding she made sure she was laid to rest where her husband was..it never happened any of it, I couldn't tell you how it ended..
But in your predicament I would maybe offer a suggestion of having a legal binding contract set up with a care charity or whatever charity you want to see you laid to rest properly and after all finances are paid they get what's left over...Just a thought
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More of a mental health question. 1 month 4 hours ago #3738238

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Traveler,
Please make sure everything is legal, seek professional help, inform whoever you are dealing with that you are deaf,
Good Luck

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