Welcome, Guest
Username: Password: Remember me
Started just before Christmas 2014 as part of Buzz50's Banish Loneliness Campaign for Seniors over 50. Still going strong in 2017!
This category is for talk about loneliness and how to tackle it. Can you can help in our campaign?

TOPIC: Widowhood and loneliness

Widowhood and loneliness 6 months 1 week ago #3241396

  • JUJO
  • JUJO's Avatar
  • Offline
  • Titanium Buzzer
  • Titanium Buzzer
  • Posts: 2969
  • Well said received: 3082
  • Points: 3089
  • Honor Medal 2010

Rose57 wrote: For all those here that have lost a spouse or partner, I send heart felt condolences.
I lost my husband of 35 yrs, 9 yrs ago. He had pulmonary fibrosis from agent orange sprayed during his service in Vietnam. His illness started out slow, a 7 yr ordeal but the last year was the hardest, I took care of him the last few months he needed 24/7 care. I’ve always been pretty self sufficient, but he always took care of all the home & mechanical repairs. At first it was a challenge but I’ve since learned, to do many of the home repairs he once did, all except mechanical repairs. Life is so different now,





Sorry for your loss Rose57.
The following user(s) said Well Said: Mykle, Gerrylady

Please Log in to join the conversation.

No home is complete without the pitter patter of kitty feet.

Widowhood and loneliness 6 months 1 week ago #3241723

  • Rose57
  • Rose57's Avatar
  • Offline
  • Platinum Buzzer
  • Platinum Buzzer
  • Posts: 899
  • Well said received: 1561
  • Points: 19790
  • Honor Medal 2010
Thanks Rosie, smile.png

Please Log in to join the conversation.

Everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about. Be kind. Always. – Robin Williams

Widowhood and loneliness 6 months 1 week ago #3242602

  • Coraline
  • Coraline's Avatar
  • Offline
  • Junior Buzzer
  • Junior Buzzer
  • Posts: 35
  • Well said received: 38
  • Points: 271
I can’t pretend to know EXACTLY how you feel, because we’re different people with different experiences in spite of our similarities, BUT I just wanted to thank you for your post. I lost my husband just under a year and a half ago. I knew he’d probably be first to go, but I had no idea how hard it would be. I’m learning to be self-reliant in ways I never had to be. The loneliness is hardest. God bless you.
The following user(s) said Well Said: Jennet, Gerrylady

Please Log in to join the conversation.

Widowhood and loneliness 6 months 1 week ago #3242612

  • Rose57
  • Rose57's Avatar
  • Offline
  • Platinum Buzzer
  • Platinum Buzzer
  • Posts: 899
  • Well said received: 1561
  • Points: 19790
  • Honor Medal 2010

Coraline wrote: I can’t pretend to know EXACTLY how you feel, because we’re different people with different experiences in spite of our similarities, BUT I just wanted to thank you for your post. I lost my husband just under a year and a half ago. I knew he’d probably be first to go, but I had no idea how hard it would be. I’m learning to be self-reliant in ways I never had to be. The loneliness is hardest. God bless you.


Thank you Caroline
I’m deepest condolences for your loss, True we all experience loss in our own way, But one thing it seems we all experience is the first year is the hardest. I commend your courage & strength it takes to take on new challenges to be self reliant. :xxx:
The following user(s) said Well Said: Gerrylady

Please Log in to join the conversation.

Everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about. Be kind. Always. – Robin Williams

Widowhood and loneliness 6 months 1 week ago #3242769

  • JUJO
  • JUJO's Avatar
  • Offline
  • Titanium Buzzer
  • Titanium Buzzer
  • Posts: 2969
  • Well said received: 3082
  • Points: 3089
  • Honor Medal 2010
A person may know their partner,husband,wife is ill, sadly they die, but in all honesty, I don’t think anything can prepare anyone for widowhood, no one knows how they will react,cope,feel,until it actually happens.
The following user(s) said Well Said: franny13, maria2, Gerrylady, Rose57

Please Log in to join the conversation.

No home is complete without the pitter patter of kitty feet.

Widowhood and loneliness 6 months 1 week ago #3243090

  • ynot
  • ynot's Avatar
  • Offline
  • Junior Buzzer
  • Junior Buzzer
  • Posts: 32
  • Well said received: 21
  • Points: 11102
  • Honor Medal 2010

JUJO wrote: A person may know their partner,husband,wife is ill, sadly they die, but in all honesty, I don’t think anything can prepare anyone for widowhood, no one knows how they will react,cope,feel,until it actually happens.


As someone who has been widowed and knew my wife was going to die, I have to agree with the above statement.
The following user(s) said Well Said: spiritofspain, Gerrylady, Rose57

Please Log in to join the conversation.

Widowhood and loneliness 6 months 1 week ago #3243127

  • Rose57
  • Rose57's Avatar
  • Offline
  • Platinum Buzzer
  • Platinum Buzzer
  • Posts: 899
  • Well said received: 1561
  • Points: 19790
  • Honor Medal 2010
When my husband of 35 yrs passed 9 yrs ago, even with the difficulties we had it was like loosing arms or legs. I couldn’t function, couldn’t even live in the house the first year. I went searching for a replacement, but it seemed I was always unhappy. I thought my happiness was dependent on others. After 8 yrs I finally decided it was time to take responsibility for my own happiness. It was awkward at first but Also rewarding, with the help of Buzz50 social interaction, the loneliness issue has been reduced significantly.
I’ve always felt awkward in social situations, most my life never felt like I fit in. So when I accidentally stumbled onto Buzz50, I almost passed it by. Ive been here less then a week but it feels much longer, it’s a new good feeling to fit in feel accepted.... Thanks Everyone
The following user(s) said Well Said: Jennet, Maryjoolz

Please Log in to join the conversation.

Everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about. Be kind. Always. – Robin Williams

Widowhood and loneliness 6 months 1 week ago #3245363

  • batman
  • batman's Avatar
  • Visitor
  • Visitor
Loneliness and depression go in hands together- We could still be lonely with or without our partners. One of things I came understand about loneliness we never spend time in ourselves and reflect on things that as taken us this far in life. After losing my son after 23 years my heart still grieve for him. You could fill your loneliness with everythings but it still doesn't take away the loneliness. For me now I fill my life trying to understand who I'm and the sort of person I become. Happiness fill my loneliness by reflecting on the past and present. So if you want to fill your loneliness try to learn about yourself and understand your abilities past and present.

Please Log in to join the conversation.

Widowhood and loneliness 6 months 1 week ago #3246046

  • Rose57
  • Rose57's Avatar
  • Offline
  • Platinum Buzzer
  • Platinum Buzzer
  • Posts: 899
  • Well said received: 1561
  • Points: 19790
  • Honor Medal 2010

batman wrote: Loneliness and depression go in hands together- We could still be lonely with or without our partners. One of things I came understand about loneliness we never spend time in ourselves and reflect on things that as taken us this far in life. After losing my son after 23 years my heart still grieve for him. You could fill your loneliness with everythings but it still doesn't take away the loneliness. For me now I fill my life trying to understand who I'm and the sort of person I become. Happiness fill my loneliness by reflecting on the past and present. So if you want to fill your loneliness try to learn about yourself and understand your abilities past and present.


Very wise words... I’m learning to do the same.

Please Log in to join the conversation.

Everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about. Be kind. Always. – Robin Williams

Widowhood and loneliness 6 months 4 days ago #3247518

  • Gerrylady
  • Gerrylady's Avatar
  • Offline
  • New Buzzer
  • New Buzzer
  • Posts: 9
  • Well said received: 15
  • Points: 178
We weren't married, but we were together for eight years.. Most of that was so much fun.
I miss his smile, voice, the way we would compete with each other doing quizzes, finding fossils, trying to jive New Years Eve (when he's 6ft 2 and I'm 5ft 2, then dissolving into laughter.. So much.
I knew he was going to die, he'd had a massive heart attack just after Christmas, then another, then another.. The pacemaker was a waste of time ( I guessed it would be) but 'jollied' him along as he fooled himself into thinking it would 'somehow' save or protect him!
He died alone when I wasn't there.
That's the bit that hurts.
It's just three months since he left.
Eventually, the crying has to stop (peoples sympathy runs out)
The house looks like a rummage sale, so time to clean.
All the tins have been munched, so it's time to cook again.
The birds need to be fed, the dog walked, so much to do.
I had no heart in it.... Yet in doing it, it helped without me realising.
Life after death... His death, now my life is there for me to get on with, because we don't get a trial run!
I will live it... Just for him.
Good luck Noelle. Sorry won't help, so I'll send you a smile....
Gerrylady
The following user(s) said Well Said: Maryjoolz, maria2, FelisConcolor, Rose57

Please Log in to join the conversation.

Moderators: pascaloumike
Time to create page: 0.244 seconds
Powered by Kunena Forum

Over 50 forums just for seniors Join Free here!

Buzz50 is one of the few sites where the forums are strictly restricted to those who are over 50 only.

Our senior forums are run by over 50s purely for over 50s to enjoy. If you like serious or even light hearted discussions then this is the place for you.