I too lost my husband after a long illness, and cared for him while I could. Its so hard, and the depression slips over you.

He was so sick for a long time, and in that time I lost the real me,

I have finally realised that you need to find yourself again, and do the things that make you happy

Im always here should you need someone to talk to

Annie

In my case my husband dying very suddenly caused a great rift within the family to the point there is no family unit anymore, despite my efforts to rebuild. Nothing is ever reciprocated Ive now given up trying as it was making me ill. So called friends we had as a married couple and my late husbands family no longer make contact. Anyone would think Ive some contagious disease!!

Yes, I can relate to a fair amount of what you've posted Blackbird, having 'worn the armband' for some considerable years now.

I would say to all of you that have found yourselves in the possibly 'unwanted' position of becoming a widow/widower.....

Be your own person! Do not allow others to sit in judgement of you, or inflict their opinions upon you as to however you choose to continue along life's path. However, beware of the many hazards/ dangers that can and possibly will present themselves. Specifically those that may harbour a desire to 'cash in' on what they may see as a ready-made comfortable lifestyle.

So sorry to everyone who has lost their partners,
Cherish every day with our partner,be grateful for everything we have,
No one knows what life has in store for them.

My heart goes out to you all.
i lost my hubby in June last year. i miss him terribly still. but i must say. since joining here. it's helped me take grief
and sadness off my mind a lot. i've made a lot of friends and i do feel happier for it. thank you everyone.
i was there with him when he died . the nurses were wonderful. and looked after him for his short illness.
' It's not Death that i am afraid of.. it's how I'm going to die' that worries me. i hope i go quick and painless. but we can't control our own destinies. and have to face what ever comes our way.i think it's the most traumatic times of our lives. losing someone close to us. and it's invitable. you know it's got to happen one day. but we dred it coming!
xx. bessie.

Big, Big warm, caring hugs to everyone who has lost a loved one.

aww bless you Keeper. xx.

I lost my husband 20 years ago and still feel the pain. Hope others can move on.

sorry to hear that Back again.

annie123 wrote: I too lost my husband after a long illness, and cared for him while I could. Its so hard, and the depression slips over you.

He was so sick for a long time, and in that time I lost the real me,

I have finally realised that you need to find yourself again, and do the things that make you happy

Im always here should you need someone to talk to

Annie

My condolences for your loss I can most definitely relate. My late husband passed in 2010 doesn’t seem like it’s been 10 yrs. I discovered the same with family and friends. To be honest his friends weren’t exactly the type of people I would have chosen so there’s not a big loss there, but we were together 35 yrs and we were closer to his family then mine. It seems I always have to be the one to initiate contact and it’s always short lived. In retrospect I’ve learned to enjoy my single life, focus on my health, hobbies and happiness. Best Wishes to you.