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Started just before Christmas 2014 as part of Buzz50's Banish Loneliness Campaign for Seniors over 50. Still going strong in 2017!
This category is for talk about loneliness and how to tackle it. Can you can help in our campaign?

TOPIC: Drop in cafe.............................for Carers and others who suffer loneliness

Drop in cafe.............................for Carers and others who suffer loneliness 2 weeks 6 hours ago #3245462

  • Rosie 2 UK
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There’s one just for you Rose. :xxx:

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Drop in cafe.............................for Carers and others who suffer loneliness 2 weeks 3 hours ago #3245527

  • sciguy18
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I’m still marveling over the science-themed cakes...

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Drop in cafe.............................for Carers and others who suffer loneliness 1 week 1 day ago #3248882

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Hello Everyone,
Hope everyone is doing well, hope lovely Meerkat and her dad are both enjoying themselves in Southport.
We have had a lot of rain,thunderstorms yesterday.

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Drop in cafe.............................for Carers and others who suffer loneliness 6 days 18 hours ago #3250274

  • LovelyMeerkat
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Hello Everyone!

Hope you are all well and having a good day.

Dad and I had a lovely time in Southport. The weather was a bit hit and miss and there were a few things we couldn't do. but it was a nice break for both of us. Was very impressed with the bathrooms at the our hotel - both wet rooms. Looking forward to having one installed in our bungalow soon.

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Drop in cafe.............................for Carers and others who suffer loneliness 6 days 2 minutes ago #3250701

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I know I've been very quiet but I'm just exhausted, feeling extremely tired and very alone in my caring role where things are getting worse and no one is stepping in to help despite my cries for help.

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Drop in cafe.............................for Carers and others who suffer loneliness 4 days 3 hours ago #3252000

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I can relate. I often feel overwhelmed and I am chronically sleep deprived. I’m sure that is at least part of the reason I always seem to drop things, knock them over, break them or have the grocery bag break and spill its contents.

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Drop in cafe.............................for Carers and others who suffer loneliness 4 days 2 hours ago #3252018

  • Rose57
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weatherpoet wrote: I know I've been very quiet but I'm just exhausted, feeling extremely tired and very alone in my caring role where things are getting worse and no one is stepping in to help despite my cries for help.


It’s been 9 years but I was were you are now. It felt like the toilet paper roll (pardon the pun) was spinning faster an faster an would soon run out. My late husbands disease was progressing faster then I could keep up. Each week his needs doubled, until I was caring for him 24/7. Getting up every 4 hrs to change the emergency huge oxygen tanks, because the oxygen concentrator could no longer supply his need. The pulmonary fibrosis was shutting down his ability to absorb oxygen. He was completely bed bound and beginning to hallucinate. I begged to everyone for help. The VA his illness was military related, finally agreed to start sending a nurse a couple times a week. He passed away 4 days later before their first visit. In retrospect I should have been more aggressive in my need for help no one believed me how quickly his health was deteriorating. Maybe help would have come sooner. All I can say is keep expressing your need for physical & emotional support & help, share your emotional exhaustion, again an again for the squeaky wheel gets the grease. There may even be support groups for care givers to ease the loneliness an offer emotional support.

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Drop in cafe.............................for Carers and others who suffer loneliness 1 day 23 hours ago #3253328

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I can quite understand what you must have gone through and I can empathise with both of you.
In my case, my oh's illness is not in itself life threatening and it's only controlled through medication so it's something I'll always have to contend with. The main problems surface when my oh stops taking the medication and the professionals don't offer any support because of the lack of resources. I'm left alone to endure the consequences of their inaction whilst continually fighting them to help before we both become ill.

It's crazy to think how the NHS is under so much pressure because of the cuts and lack of resources, and yet in millions of cases there is a carer looking after one of their patients but because of those same cuts and lack of resources, they end up doubling their patients through the carers that become ill due to exactly the same cuts and lack of support. In other words, its's a domino effect and it just snowballs but you only find out for yourself when you or a member of your family becomes ill and your lives are suddenly impacted yourselves. We can't all work towards becoming millionaires so that we're able to afford private healthcare and private carers when we're too sleep deprived by day and night to even contemplate of working but the "hidden" carers are very easy to ignore and be left to cope alone until they break.

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Drop in cafe.............................for Carers and others who suffer loneliness 11 hours 48 minutes ago #3254366

  • Lorna Doone
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Hello WP, you are quite right in what you say, carers are quietly left to get on with it on their own: friends and even family members are somehow busy with other things and fade away just when they could make a difference. Is it because they feel helpless, or embarrassed, or is it because they don't like the thought of what may be in store for themselves? Or is it that people just don't have time for each other these days.

I don't know the answer but I do know that what you describe is not unusual and often it is only when something catastrophic happens that people 'hear' really 'hear' the true reality of being a long time carer and then we all say, " how terrible, how sad! Somebody should have done something!"

I know it's no use to you but I do understand what you are going through and how desperate and invisible you can feel, no one reacting to your silent screams. Have you tried talking to your local MP to see if he could get things moving for you in the way of NHS help? Might be worth a try.

:xxx:

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Last edit: by Lorna Doone.

Drop in cafe.............................for Carers and others who suffer loneliness 10 hours 19 minutes ago #3254413

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Hello everyone! smile.png

Sorry I haven't been around recently :( but I think I've got my mojo back so tell me all the goss, what's been happening, who said what :ohmy:

I see all the cakes have gone, not blaming you PG. :P I think sciguy has taken a fancy to Rosie's little temptations :ohmy: so you need to get in a bit quicker!

Good to see that you and your dad enjoyed the trip to the seaside LMK, pity the weather wasn't kinder but a change is as good as a rest!smile.png what's your next Treat?

Kind of you to take the time Rose to respond to WP with your own experience. You mentioned the VA and like you my sister who used to live in North Carolina was unaware of the help she could get from them but for the last year of her husband's life they were a Godsend. Her husband was a Korean veteran and is buried in the military cemetery.
How are you coping with life on your own now?

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